While MPBC Students or Mount Pleasant Baptist Church may not fully endorse every resource we share, we hope they serve as a helpful starting point for families to engage in meaningful conversations around difficult topics. Our goal is to support you in navigating these important discussions with care and understanding from a biblical perspective.
alcohol
Underage drinking is always dangerous, but maybe not only for the reasons we were warned of growing up. While underage drinking is often primarily associated with car accidents, drug use, partying, and/or legal trouble, Gen Z is susceptible to additional dangers that we as parents might not be thinking of. As an unprecedented number of teens are struggling with anxiety, depression, and loneliness, more and more of them are using alcohol not to have fun, but to cope with and escape from those feelings. Because these emotions are something we all face throughout our lives, developing a habit of dealing with them by drinking can have longer lasting consequences than social drinking.
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anxiety & Depression
Feelings of anxiety and anxiety disorders are different. Anxiousness or anxious feelings come and go, do not inhibit a person’s ability to function, and are usually triggered by specific circumstances. Anxiety disorders are chronic, do not always have an identifiable cause, and are severe enough to interfere with a person’s ability to go about their daily life. While everyone experiences anxiety on some level and not everyone would qualify as having an anxiety disorder, the latter is rapidly on the rise, particularly in young people—and not only teens, but in children as young as three years old. The World Health Organization has found that since the COVID-19 pandemic, the number of people worldwide who have been diagnosed with anxiety disorders has risen by 25%. And that statistic only reflects those who have sought out a diagnosis; it doesn’t include those struggling without one.
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bullying
Bullying is a complex issue that can involve a variety of underlying causes, including emotional struggles and social pressures. Addressing it requires understanding, patience, and a commitment to helping children navigate their feelings and relationships in a healthy and respectful way.
The truth is that there is no profile when it comes to bullying. Roy Moore, Founder and Executive Director of Be Strong, a nonprofit dedicated to ending bullying, says, “Bullying does not respect boundaries.” A petite teenage girl could actually be the one bullying a huge football player—maybe not physically, but psychologically and emotionally. Bullying is a complex issue. As such, it does not have a simple solution.
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The truth is that there is no profile when it comes to bullying. Roy Moore, Founder and Executive Director of Be Strong, a nonprofit dedicated to ending bullying, says, “Bullying does not respect boundaries.” A petite teenage girl could actually be the one bullying a huge football player—maybe not physically, but psychologically and emotionally. Bullying is a complex issue. As such, it does not have a simple solution.
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Dating
If you were to ask most millennials or Gen Xers if their parents sat them down to talk to them about dating and sex, their answer would be no. Even if their response is yes, the conversation may have gone something like, “Don’t get a girl pregnant,” or “If you lay down with dogs, you’ll wake up with fleas.” These are true stories from many of our friends. In fact, a friend of Axis shared that the only instruction her parents gave her about dating was that she couldn’t date until she was sixteen. She turned sixteen, got her license to drive and date. There was no conversation about character, attraction, boundaries, or appropriate and inappropriate touch. “There were more conversations on how to drive than how to date,” she said.
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discipling teens
As our post-Christian culture increasingly marginalizes Christianity, it is critical for those of us who care about the next generation not to take a business-as-usual approach to their formation. If we do nothing they will be shaped away from life with God in Christ. We have the opportunity to reimagine what passing on our faith to the next generation looks like in this unique cultural moment. Let’s be creative, courageous, and faithful!
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eating disorders
Besides increases in mental health issues such as anxiety and depression, today’s teens also face heightened risks of developing eating disorders. Between access to social media and the constant presence of pop culture, teens are faced with portrayals of unhealthy eating habits and deeper eating distress everywhere they look. As there are a myriad of websites and organizations dedicated to educating the public about eating disorders and to helping sufferers find lasting recovery, the goal of this guide will be to help give you information on how technology and current culture uniquely contribute to the issue of teens and eating disorders.
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fear & Worry
Will there ever be a convenient time to worry? Hardly! But worry has an ugly way of rearing its head at inconvenient times, as we all know. We try not to worry, but our attempts often seem futile, which in turn makes it hard to be confident in helping our kids navigate through their own fear and worry. Fear is real—in fact, God created it (more on this below)—but worry is never beneficial. By looking a little closer at the problems of fear and worry, we can learn where they come from, what they are at their root, how to overcome them through the power of God, and how to help our kids do the same.
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FOMO (FEAR of missing out)
The desire not to be left out is universal: No one wants to be miss out on something interesting or important. This desire, which is especially strong during adolescence, stems from a God-given yearning to participate in meaningful experiences and be in meaningful community. So while it’s a natural human tendency to fear being excluded, it’s unhealthy when we let this fear control our lives. But rather than getting easier, it’s only gotten harder to resist feeling left out.
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friendship
Friendship is different from many of the other relationships we have because it’s something we choose and create ourselves. No one is forcing the people into the relationship, and it doesn’t require anything specific of either member. They stay friends because they enjoy each other’s company and like doing things together. These kinds of relationships are essential to human happiness and wellbeing. In many ways, friendships shape our lives more than any other relationships we have.
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understanding gen z
Are you looking at today’s teenagers and wondering why they’re always online or how on earth their views on sexuality, government, and life in general can be so drastically different from yours. In the U.S., the most recent generation to come of age is Generation Z, or Gen Z. American society has gone through incredible change in the past few decades, which has especially impacted how teenagers see the world because of their age and level of development. In this Guide, we want to look at how the generations have changed over time, what has shaped Gen Z’s views on life, and how that knowledge can help you connect with your kids better.
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gender identity
The 21st century offers us limitless options to choose not only what we buy, but where we go, what we do, and most significantly, who we are. Nowhere is this more evident than in our culture’s treatment of gender. A question that one hundred years ago would have sounded like pure gibberish to the average person has now become commonplace: ”What if the body I’m in doesn’t match the gender I feel I really am?”
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having difficult conversations
Bringing up tough conversations about subjects like sex, bullying, suicide, pornography, death, or school shootings is intimidating. We might want to do everything we can to avoid those conversations or to get out of them as fast as possible when they come up. It’s understandable, but just as we wouldn’t put our kids behind the wheel without any driver’s training and hope it all turns out okay, we can’t and shouldn’t do the same with other skills—including coping, grieving, and standing up for themselves.
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hearing from God
People may desire spiritual guidance for a variety of reasons, but one of the biggest reasons is for help on what decisions to make. In this Parent Guide, we’ll talk about how to encourage your teens to find dependable spiritual guidance in Jesus. We’ll talk about the role of scripture, the role of the Holy Spirit, and share some principles to help you and your teens stay grounded along the way.
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instagram
Though much younger than its predecessors, Instagram has become a social media behemoth through its simplicity, ease of us, and focus on imagery. Along with Snapchat, it’s considered by many teens as a non-negotiable in their arsenal of online profiles. So what’s the good, bad, and ugly of the app? Let’s look at how the app is changing us, both for better and worse.
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internet filtering software
There’s no question that there’s a lot of filth on the Internet. And it’s pretty easy to bump into. Sean Clifford, CEO of the digital parenting app Canopy, notes, “You don’t have to go looking for [porn], it now comes looking for you. It’s on social media, on group chats, and on ‘good’ websites that you’d never expect to have explicit content.” A recent survey found that 46% of minors who’ve seen pornography first came across it by accident. Internet filters are extremely useful tools in a world where inappropriate content seeks us out. But we shouldn’t use them as a replacement for relationships and conversation; as a friend of ours wisely said, “Setting up a filter on your child’s device is a great moment for a conversation.”
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lgbtq+
Modern teens are growing up in a culture that has changed significantly since the ’90s. If they aren’t questioning their own sexuality, they have friends who are. They’re living in a society where Harry Styles is modeling Gucci’s womenswear and where there are so many letters in the current LGBTQ+ initialism (LGBTTQQIAAP) 4 that it’s simpler to use a plus sign than to list all of them. It’s no longer as big a deal to explore what it means to be gay or bisexual. Young people now tend to focus more on the newer terms represented by the acronym: queer, questioning, intersex, ally, asexual, and pansexual. Even if your kids don’t struggle with their sexual orientation or gender identity, they probably know people who do. For the most part, the way the church has addressed these issues has been inadequate at best and polarizing at worst. What follows is what we think you need to know about what is shaping Gen Z’s perceptions of these issues, as well as how you can engage well with your teen and the LGBTQ+ community.
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modesty
So much modesty talk today ends in a deadlock, with parents and leaders straight up asserting that certain things shouldn’t be worn, and teenagers crossing their arms in anger and defiance, promising themselves that the moment they get outside their parents’ and leaders’ jurisdiction, they’ll dress however they want—and that until then, they’ll push every envelope and test every boundary they can. Needless to say, this is not the mutually upbuilding life we want to cultivate, even if we’re sure our side of the debate is the right one.
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money
Imagine asking your co-worker what their salary is. Or your friend how much they paid for their car. Or your aunt how much she spends on clothes in a year. Money is an unavoidable tool, but it can feel pretty weird to talk about specific dollar amounts. To a lot of us, money feels earthy and unspiritual. Jesus didn’t have a 401k. He wasn’t checking the Nasdaq or the Dow Jones. He probably owned next to nothing. Yet Jesus talked about money, or used it to illustrate His teachings, quite a bit. Why? Money reveals.
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pornography
There are few cultural issues more pressing than the problem of pornography. Though extremely damaging to us, porn appeals to powerful urges that God created as good. Sexually explicit material has always been a cultural pitfall, but the Internet and smartphones have provided unprecedented access to it.
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privacy
The definition of privacy can not only differ from household to household and teen to teen, but might even be different between a parent and their own teen. What a teen sees as privacy might look like secrecy to a parent, and what a parent understands to be accountability might be experienced as hovering or a lack of trust to a teen. If there was a formula for perfect boundaries and rules about privacy and parenting, we would share it. But because that’s just not possible, it might be better to look at the question of privacy from a different angle. Rather than trying to figure out exactly how to draw what can feel like battle lines around what your teen can and can’t do in private, let’s ask this question: how can we send the message that we want to trust our teens?
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purity
As our kids become preteens, then teenagers, and eventually adults, we Christian parents desire to equip them with knowledge, truth, and the ability to navigate the sexual landscape. How to do just that is a hot topic, particularly in the evangelical Protestant world. From purity rings and purity balls to books and bracelets, an entire culture has developed. But often, it doesn’t seem to have worked. Parents are left wondering where they went wrong and why their children have abandoned sexual purity altogether. Young adults feel crushed and wounded by how their sexuality was treated, often citing what’s come to be known as “purity culture” as one of the main reasons they’re disenchanted with the Church. So where do we go from here? How can we take the good from the conversations we’ve been having, reject what is wrong, and raise our kids with a desire to be pure before God?
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purpose
It’s hard to understand what our purpose as humans is. We can look for it everywhere––work, family, relationships, hobbies, religion. We can look
to teachers, government leaders, or other authority figures for a sense of purpose. Those aren’t bad places to seek purpose, but they can ultimately prove fruitless if they aren’t paired with meaning that comes from a relationship with God. Only that is going to be able to lead us and our teens in the pursuit of the purpose for which we were designed.
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to teachers, government leaders, or other authority figures for a sense of purpose. Those aren’t bad places to seek purpose, but they can ultimately prove fruitless if they aren’t paired with meaning that comes from a relationship with God. Only that is going to be able to lead us and our teens in the pursuit of the purpose for which we were designed.
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racism
The purpose of this guide is not to give a definitive solution to the problem of racism, to give a history of racism, or to unpack every way racism may intertwine with our social systems today. At Axis, our goal is always to equip parents and caring adults with information and confidence to have conversations with the teens in their lives. We want you to be ready when the topic of racism arises, so this guide will be based on a Biblical understanding of what racism is and how we as Christians are called to respond to it.
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sabbath & Rest
Whenever “keeping the Sabbath holy” is presented as an arbitrary command, God quickly turns into a dictator whose job is to invent rules to make us miserable. In the New Testament, Jesus often broke the Sabbath to prove to law-keepers that they had missed the whole point: God has a vision for human flourishing. God has a specific shape of life in which we can be blessed—and believe it or not, resting is part of this. In fact, teenagers (whose whole goal in life is to sleep in as late as humanly possible, amiright?) might be better Sabbath-keepers than we parents. Let’s explore the “big picture” of God’s design for human flourishing and, from this, begin to understand why the Sabbath is relevant (and even fun!) for families today.
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sexting
Today’s culture teaches teens that rebellion is part of growing up, that hiding one’s actions from prying eyes is normal, and that sex is no big deal. Because of that, sexting has become normalized—everyone does it! Right? Whether your teens attend public school, private school, or homeschool, they are not immune to the influence of culture, thanks to the ubiquity of the internet and smartphones.
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smartphones
The truth is, they might be a really good kid; but all kids are curious, and the lure of things they know they aren’t supposed to engage with is often very strong. You’ll probably never face this exact scenario as a parent, but the internet is often very much like the scene we just described—and arguably poses even more of a danger. The internet has the potential to be an incredible tool for good, but it is also full of opportunities to dive into some of the darkest parts of humanity. And in our day and age, pretty much everyone in the world has instant access to all of this right in their pocket.
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Snapchat
A communication app that allows users to exchange pictures and videos that expire (disappear) after the amount of time a user chooses, between 1 and 10 seconds, or they can choose the “no limit” option, which has no time limit and does not expire after a certain number of seconds. Users can also exchange private chat messages that can be saved by tapping on the message, and pictures/videos can be screenshotted by the receiver
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social media
For basically all of time, parents have taught children how to do things properly—things like building fires, saddling horses, baking bread, plowing fields, or, more recently, making phone calls, answering the door, and driving cars. But over the last few decades, this natural order has been upended, thanks to our immense technological advancements. Now, it’s the children who show parents how to send text messages, post on Facebook, use Snapchat filters, and make TikTok videos. As technology continues to advance rapidly, children adapt and learn while parents struggle to keep up. This guide will hopefully help put parents back in the driver’s seat because children still need guidance, wisdom, and, yes, sometimes even boundaries to keep them healthy and safe on social media as they learn and grow.
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struggle
For this guide, Axis has partnered with Mercy Multiplied, a ministry committed to helping teenagers and adults break free from issues like anxiety, depression, eating disorders, self-harm, addiction, and unplanned pregnancy. Our goal is to help parents know how to respond to struggling teens from a place of health and love. In this guide, you will discover practical and effective ways to respond to your teenage children when they are struggling. You will also find practices we can all use to remain healthy and whole as you engage with a teen who might be struggling.
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Suicide & Self harm prevention
Let’s acknowledge the elephant in the room: This is a scary topic that no parent wants to even think about. Which is completely understandable. After all, God created us for flourishing, abundant life, and relationship with him, not pain, sadness, or the desire to no longer live. Unfortunately, our broken world is full of dysfunction, disorder, and sin, all of which disrupt and decay the beautiful world God lovingly created for us. So what do we do when that reality hits home, when our children struggle with very real issues? How do we help our kids find physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual healing? First, let us assure you that if you or a loved one is struggling, you’re not alone.
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teen identity
In the heart of every person is a deep-rooted question: “Who am I, and how do I fit into the world around me?” In other words, what makes me “me”? Am I the roles that I play (friend, sibling, athlete)? Am I a set of characteristics (quiet, bubbly, confident)? Am I my thoughts, emotions, body, soul, actions . . . a summation of these things? It can be difficult to navigate our teens’ search for identity with healthy language, perspective, and grace. The Christian story for the world has a stunning message about who we are. Our challenge is to contextualize that story in the modern world, the world of popular culture.
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the bible
It’s probably not very often that we hear the Bible talked about like a virus imprinted in our cell structures, but what if Anna Carter Florence is on to something here? What if much of our conversation about the Bible is missing the point? What would it be like to imagine that the Bible has the power to change how we live from the inside out? How would it change the way we read or talk about the Bible? How would it help our teens to view the Bible as relevant to their everyday lives, rather than an outdated list of arbitrary rules to follow? What if the Bible helped us start more conversations and ask more questions, rather than ending conversations and winning arguments?
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tiktok
TikTok has rapidly gained popularity among teens and tweens since its launch in 2016. As a destination for short-form mobile videos, users upload videos of themselves lip-syncing, telling jokes, dancing, etc. For parents of young people who use the app (or keep asking to), it’s helpful to know what it is, its pitfalls and dangers, and how to talk to them about it in order to help them pursue the flourishing God intends for us in every area of our lives.
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vaping & Nicotine
Parenting conversations about smoking aren’t new; they’re practically one of the classics (right alongside drinking, drugs, and the one that starts with “you might notice your body is starting to change”). But as the advent of vaping and its popularity among young people has drastically changed how teens think about smoking, we as parents have to change how we talk about it. It can be easy to think of conversations about substance use as a parenting to-do; an unnecessary and annoying requirement, a “scared straight” statistics presentation, or something in between. If we can shift our focus, though, we can see a conversation about vaping and nicotine use as an opportunity to remind our teens of how valuable they are.
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video games
Few topics in today’s media-saturated world can get a parent or teacher ranting like kids and video gaming. According to Pew Research Center, 72% of teens have played video games in the last year, and they only represent 28% of the video-game-playing population. The video gaming world often represents unknown territory to parents, though, and their attempts to enforce boundaries and limits on their gaming kids typically end in tension and conflict.
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youtube
The days when you used to wait till Saturday night to watch your favorite show are long gone. This might be old news to you—after all, Netflix has grown pretty popular. But when asked which online service they couldn’t “‘live without,’” 67% of users aged 13-24 named YouTube, with 85% saying it was something they regularly watch. YouTube easily surpassed Netflix, traditional TV, and other social media platforms such as Facebook and Instagram. So what’s the appeal? What are they watching that they can’t live without? What are all the different subscriptions now associated with it? How do we talk to them about it all? And most importantly, how do we teach our children to set healthy boundaries around all of their media usage, including YouTube?
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